An Unperposeful Life
by nightingaleblue
Summary: When Fate has a sense of humor... Amphie is sent to Narnia during the Voyage of the Dawn Treader, with the simple task to find out why the heck she's there and just cause geneal confusion... This is just my first attempt so be pre-warned of some cringe... and I promise the writing will become more interesting as the story goes on!


My story begins with me pretty much drowning in the ocean.

It was an unfortunate situation, but that wasn't really an unusual occurance. Besides, I could tread water. I was a strong femal person. I wasn't entirely useless.

So I bobbed in the spot, spitting salt water out of my mouth and considering the idea of kicking off my shoes to help me survive. But they were nice shoes. They had survived many an adventure.

Looking out over my surroundings, I relaxed slightly, not too worried. There was a ship on the horizon, coming my way. I'd be fine. If I got stung by a jellyfish, someone on that ship could pee on me for me, not that that was a likely thing to happen, but you never know. I'm all about that positive lifestyle.

I waved my hand in the air as it came closer, sputtering and coughing.

"Hey!!!" -*cough cough*- "HEY!"

No response. Of course. They were all assholes, every one of them.

"HEYYYYY!!!!!"

Suddenly, a man in fucking renaissance clothes appeared at the top of the ship and looked down at me in the water. I bobbed in surprise. Renaissance man or not, I was willing to be saved.

I helpfully swam a little closer as he threw down a rope into the water. It took a while, but after many good and honest attempts, I managed to grab the rope. This is not as easy as it might sound, so no judgment.

I climbed while he pulled, shouting encouragements, and I heaved my soggy self over the side, stumbling and falling to my hands and knees. Sitting there, with strange blurry people around me, felt very... _unnatural_. I felt _exposed_.

After a moment of silence, I raised my head and blinked saltwater out of my eyes. The first thing I saw was a huge-ass hairy man with a legit bulls head, holding an axe.

" _Fucking_ _Christ_!" I barked, startled. " _Oh_ my _God_."

The Renaissance Man, who apparently was standing right above me, put his hand on my shoulder.

"Hey. Calm down, it's all right."

I eyeballed him. He was blurry without my glasses on.

"Huh?"

"You're fine," he repeated. "Just relax. Catch your breath."

I sniffled and dug for my glasses, snugly kept safe under my bra. I pushed them on and blinked several times.

The Renaissance Man was in actually a guy in his late teens, from what I could tell. Beside him was a dark haired kid my age, who was hella pale, but had marvellously brown eyes. They both looked at me with a mixture of concern and confusion.

"Are you okay?" The kid with the beautiful eyes asked.

"Who _are_ you?" Renaissance Young Man asked, looking dumbfounded.

I stood up, shakily. "I... I was in the ocean."

The two of them glanced at each other.

"We know that..." Renaissance Young Man began, "but _how_ did you get there?"

I frowned. Why would I know that.

"I don't know. I stepped into the pond and then I was in the ocean." I shrugged. "I died. I'm in heaven."

The Eyes Kid grabbed Renaissance Young Man's arm. "She must be like us, she's from our world."

Renaissance Young Man frowned. "But why? Why is she here?"

"I... I don't know."

Having no idea what they were talking about, I decided to tastefully pretend to agree with whatever they were saying while trying to twist dry my hair.

"What's going on?" called the voice of a girl, coming up from below deck. "Caspian? Edmund?"

We all turned to look at her. She was younger than me, but very cute. She had a very clear, pleasant voice.

Of course, I was more paying attention to the gigantic rat on her shoulder, but hey, whatever floats her boat.

She smiled at me, a bit confused, but inviting no less. "Hello."

I smiled right back. "Pleasure."

The rat also greeted me with a polite, "good afternoon, my lady."

All of my blood froze and my muscles went stiff, but - "uh hello."

I don't discriminate.

The girl tilted her head. "Uh... who are you?"

"That's what we were asking," Eyes kid muttered. "What's your name?"

"Oh, uh..." I shivered. "Amphie. Amphie Merriwether."

"I'm Lucy," the girl said happily. "And that's Edmund and King Caspian."

Edmund was the Eyes kid. Caspian was Renaissance Young Man.

"And this is Reepicheep." She pointed at the rat. It did a head bow in response.

"Reepicheep," I repeated, nodding. "Bomb name, my good sir."

"Why, thank you."

For a moment they all looked at me in mystified silence. I had never been regarded in such a way. It was refreshing.

But then it quickly became awkward, so I coughed in an effective sort of way.

"I - I don't know what's going on," I admitted, shaking from the cold. "Could - could you - _maybe_..."

Caspian, again, touched my shoulder. Fucker.

"This is Narnia," he said carefully, as Lucy handed me a blanket. "Are you from here, or any countries around us?"

I frowned. "Uh, I'm from Newcastle."

Lucy smiled. "We're from England too."

Her and Edmund. They must be siblings or something.

" _Okay_...?"

"Have you been to Narnia before?" Caspian asked me.

"Obviously not," Edmund said before I could respond. "Aslan would have told us at least."

"Who's Aslan?" I asked him.

"A lion," Edmund replied, as though he was allowed to say something like that.

I nodded. "Oh. Okay."

"She must have arrived for a reason," Reepicheep... _cheeped_ , scrambling off of Lucy's shoulder. "Aslan must have a plan."

"Yeah, he must," I agreed, nodding. Everyone looked at me a bit oddly.

" _Er._.. We'll let her stay, won't we Caspian?" Lucy chirped. "Look at her, she's pitiful."

I cracked a confused smile. I mean, fine, my red-brown hair, usually curly, was plastered all over my face, and my clothes were clingy and dripping, but... was _pitiful_ a necessary word?

"Well there isn't anything else we could do with her," Caspian said thoughtfully. "And Reep's right, there must be a reason she's here."

Edmund shrugged. I was getting a pissy vibe from him, he definitely had an attitude. I could respect that.

"She can stay in my cabin!" Lucy said excitedly. "I have the space."

"Oh," I said quickly. "I mean, I don't want to cause any..."

"It's no trouble!" Lucy said. "I'll take you down and get you dried off."

She grabbed my hand, leading me to the stairs, past the silent bull-headed man with the ax. He looked at us.

"Hold on," Caspian said, stopping us. "I need to talk to you about something first, Lu. But you're right, she should warm up. The last thing we need is pneumonia on board."

I raised my eyebrows. Pneumonia eh.

Lucy pointed down the stairs. "You can go already. It's perfectly easy to find, just down the corridor."

"Uh what?" I blurted as she pushed me. "O - Okay?"

And then I was alone in the shaft of light. I could still hear them talking, probably _about_ me, but that was okay. I couldn't really blame them.


End file.
